FBI Director James Comey confessed on Sunday that he has a new coping mechanism for the “bad blood” he still harbors against the president: Taylor Swift.
Yes, you read that right.
In a bizarre video posted to his Substack, the 6-foot-8 former top cop announced he’s been a full-blown Swiftie, leaning on the pop icon’s lyrics to guide him through life in President Donald Trump’s America.
“While our elderly makeup-covered president is posting about whether Taylor Swift is still hot and declaring that he can’t stand her, what’s she doing?” Comey mused, sounding more like a giddy fanboy than a former federal official. “Living her best life, producing great music and as she urged all of us to do during the podcast, not giving the jerks power over her mind.”
Comey was referencing Swift’s appearance on the New Heights podcast with her boyfriend, Travis Kelce, and his brother, Jason, where she advised listeners to guard their “energy” like it’s expensive.
The ousted FBI chief apparently took the advice to heart.
Trump recently slammed the singer as “no longer hot” while heaping praise on Euphoria star Sydney Sweeney. Last year, he blasted on Truth Social: “I HATE TAYLOR SWIFT,” boasting that he torpedoed her popularity. Swift, for her part, endorsed Joe Biden in 2020 and backed Kamala Harris during the 2024 campaign.
Comey, however, insists he and Swift “go way back.”
“I went to my first concert of hers 15 years ago,” he bragged. “And I have helped financially support the attendance of a lot of family members and others. I’m in a family Swiftie group chat. I know all her music.” His all-time favorites? “All Too Well” and “Exile.”
That’s right — the man once in charge of the nation’s top law enforcement agency claims he is sorting out his feelings about Trump by blasting T-Swift’s breakup ballads.
“I struggle with how to stand up to bullies without letting their meanness infect me and change me,” Comey admitted. He took a swipe at California Gov. Gavin Newsom, who often trolls Trump online. “I find it very funny, hilarious even sometimes. But I gotta be honest, it also leaves me with a strange feeling … because I don’t want us to become like Trump and his followers. There are far more decent, honest, kind people in America than there are mean jerks.”
Comey even recalled his second Swift concert, in Hartford, Connecticut, 14 years ago. “She sang a song about this topic, asking why you got to be so mean,” he said wistfully. “She spoke directly to the nasty people, ‘I bet you got pushed around. Somebody made you cold, but the cycle ends right now.’”
“Nobody should have power over us,” Comey concluded. “Thank you, Taylor Swift.”
Critics might argue the former FBI boss should spend less time quoting Swift lyrics and more time explaining his own conduct in office. Comey, after all, was fired by Trump in 2017, sparking the Mueller investigation and years of political warfare. He’s remained a fierce Trump critic ever since.
Just this spring, Comey triggered a Secret Service review when he arranged seashells on the beach into the number “8647.” “86” is slang for getting rid of someone. Trump, of course, is the 47th president. The post was widely seen as a veiled threat before Comey insisted it was just misunderstood “art” and quietly deleted it.